US Government implements holacracy with 4 million co-CEO’s

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The decision was made by its 327.2 million shareholders after bad management by its former CEO halved the company’s market value.

The restructuring, making all of its federal employees co-CEO’s, was announced after former CEO @realdonaldtrump and shareholders could not come to an agreement over if brown and yellow M&M’s should be allowed in the United States.

MBT tracked down several former employees who were discharged by management. Hillary Clinton, who wishes to stay anonymous says: “We wouldn’t have had this problem if I was hired as CEO.” The woman says she communicates via private servers, making public accountability impossible.

Another former employee is less critical: “A company gets the leadership it wants. Or at least, what the Russian government wants. Apparently, the Russians value the 4 million co-CEO’s higher than its former representative.”